Over the last decade, I’ve surrendered to some humbling realizations.

I almost can’t believe that I am now living a fulfilling life with a beautiful family that I helped create. But I am.

Before this time in my life, though, there were issues that literally took years for me to work through.

One of these issues for me was sex. Well, sober sex that is — or rather a lack of it.

I’m not sure I realized how long it had actually been since I had engaged in sex with someone while completely sober until the moment I was about…

I’ve found myself objecting lately when I hear people say something was ‘better than sex.’

My immediate response is, ‘You mean GOOD sex, right?’

Am I alone on this?

I can’t tell you how many references to things being better than sex or being just as good as sex that I hear and read about.

Just because you’re having sex doesn’t mean it’s necessarily ‘good’ sex. It just means you’re physically having sexual intercourse.

No one ever talks about the ‘bad’ sex — the sex that can never be as good as chocolate or even as good as sleeping in…

Relationships can often be painful, draining, and uncomfortable — even though we may cherish them greatly.

This is because relationships require us to crack open our most vulnerable selves — to unveil the parts of us we may not like or the parts we rush to hide.

Relationships require far more than fanciful dreams and giddy lust. A real-world partnership and/or marriage with another human being takes guts — cold, hard, gritty guts.

It’s not for everyone.

Though we may see couples out and about holding hands, touching one another tenderly, or looking lovingly into each other’s eyes, there’s always…

I once wrote an article about my experience falling in love with a married man. It’s not something I’m proud of but it’s something I choose not to feel shame for anymore, especially after all these years.

However, along with that article came an outpouring of stories and experiences from other women about their own affairs with married men. The response was overwhelming.

The women who have reached out to me are not heartless women. These are women who are searching for solace and for closure.

So many women who have written to me asking for advice feel trapped in…

The thing about trust is that once you lose it with someone — after they betray you or let you down in some way — you tend to never get that feeling back again.

In the case of why people divorce, generally speaking, there’s usually some sort of betrayal, a lack of communication, a loss of compatibility, or a significant misunderstanding involved that cannot be mended for whatever reasons.

A loss of trust and a faltering of faith in a partner whom you committed to in marriage is not an easy thing to get over.

Divorce breaks some people. It…

No one really knows what goes on behind closed doors, as the saying goes.

This expression could not be more accurate — especially when we’re talking about the sex lives of couples who are married versus the sex lives of couples who aren’t married.

Argue if you like, but I would say that the perception people have of the sex lives of couples who are dating and/or in a relationship is vastly different than their perception of what happens in a married couple’s bedroom.

Generally speaking, I think many of us are somehow programmed to think that couples who aren’t…

Relationships are a journey full of peaks, valleys, and weird, unexpected gray areas in between.

Caring for a partner and their needs is not without a certain sacrifice.

Relationships take a concerted effort. Marriage is a serious commitment.

Those of us who have experienced these kinds of relationships already know all of these things.

Staying interested and engaged with your partner after many, many years is not only a challenge but it often takes remembering who it is that you are in a relationship with — and why you were attracted to them in the first place.

Losing that intoxicating…

I went through a strange period after my divorce and subsequent affair with a married man where I developed a crush on the kind of man I may not have ordinarily been attracted to — or at least I thought so.

Most of the men I had previously been with up until this particular point in my life were what most women would describe as bad boys. You know, the villainous daredevil types with lots of charisma and no bank account.

In reality, these bad boys often turned out to be wild, insecure maniacs with absolutely no plan for the…